I’m sure everyone who has Yahoo! as a homepage has seen this, but I just have to blog about this.

From a TIME article:

Alec Greven, author of the new dating guide How to Talk to Girls, has a lot going for him. He’s clean-cut, confident and a published author. He is also 9 years old. And although his relationship advice is nothing new — girls like gifts and attention from boys; they get mad when they discover a boy has been trying to date multiple people at once — its simplicity is remarkably accurate. So much for dating websites and call-in shows: the real answers can be found in what began as a $3 pamphlet handed out at his Colorado elementary school.

Haha, here are some of the highlights in the book:

On relationships: “Sometimes, you get a girl to like you, then she ditches you. Life is hard, move on! Or sometimes it just doesn’t work out. I had a crush on a girl in preschool. Then my family had to move, so I had to let her wash out of my mind.”

On having a crush: “Many boys get crushes on girls. But it can be very hard to get a girl to like you. Sometimes it takes years! Whatever happens, just don’t act desperate. Girls don’t like desperate boys. So what do you do if you have a crush on a girl? You need to get her to like you. You can also show off a skill, like playing soccer or anything else you’re good at. If you are in elementary school, try to get a girl to like you, not to love you. Wait until middle school to try to get her to love you. Otherwise, you have to hold on to her for a long time and that would be very hard. Tip: Most boys in elementary school can hold on to a girl for only 30 days.”

On gifts: “It is also good to give gifts. They don’t have to be big. Try to find out what she likes before you give her something. You should go around to her friends to get ideas. And I wouldn’t do flowers and gifts until you are older, like in middle school, because it seems weird in elementary school. Unless you go to a school dance.”

And he’s got this great little soundbite where he says that pretty girls are like expensive cars that need lots of oil. Oh man, what a kid.

But while I think it’s kind of hilarious, my sister would beg to differ. She finds a 9-year-old Casanova to be the creepiest thing in the world. And I read another WordPress blog that compares this kid to Michael Jackson…but reverse or something like that.

Now that’s priceless.

Mmkay, off to class. See?? I am trying to update!